One-Line Movie Reviews

Spring is 55 days away. Until then, I’ll swath myself in wool sweaters and blankets. I’ll wear down 9 sticks of lip balm and drink enough hot tea to fill Buckeye Lake. And I’ll rely on massive movie consumption to help me cope until this Great White Frigid Despair is replaced with unhunched shoulders and degrees above forty. Here’s a list of recommended movies that I’ve watched in the past month that will (hopefully) aid you in quashing winter’s chill.

All About Steve: For fans of crossword puzzles, individualism, and the non-blockbuster side of Sandra Bullock.

An Education: A sophisticated yet heartbreaking British tale of growing young.

Black Swan: Another Darren Aronofsky masterpiece, dissecting elite-level ballet through lithe self-slaughter.

Cyrus: Proof that puppy love can hit later in life, and a warning that delightfully awkward moments may accompany it.

Going The Distance: Long-distance relationships suck, but they’re quite fun to analyze.

Invictus: An intimate peek at rugby’s roughness, Morgan Freeman’s virtuosity, and South Africa’s progress.

Iron Man 2: Cheeky comic book gallantry and Mickey Rourke’s attempt to speak with a Russian accent.

Please Give: Manhattanites are sometimes unglamorous and often chaotic, but rarely empty of life lessons.

The Kids Are All Right: A loosely piercing diorama of natural love and unnatural consequences.

The King’s Speech: One man’s debilitating journey to liberate his voice, and another’s unorthodox quest to validate it.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World: An unpredictable tilt-a-whirl of tangy aggression and youthful spunk.

Tenure: Raise your hand if you like Volvos, cardigans, academia, and New England sensibilities.

Winter’s Bone: A harrowing and unforgettable way to spend 100 minutes.